Confinement with your man

Confinement with your man

Sorry – Confinement with your kids and your 2 seconds of romance with your man in an endless quarantine

As you all know, the whole world is on lockdown. If you are a child, you are probably having the best time of your life. Your parents are too exhausted to bathe you everyday. A little dirt on a 4 year old won’t kill nobody. You do not have to wake up early for school BUT FOR SOME UNGODLY REASON YOU STILL WAKE UP EARLY and do what you feel like. Yes, you do because your parents are still trying to catch up on their very short night’s sleep.

Night is when you can finally get some proper work done.

If you are a child in a grown up body, aka an adult: life is not as much fun. Bills won’t pay themselves if you twiddle your thumbs (or anything else you like to twiddle). So you try to set boundaries and rules and breaks —> Wake up in the morning, take a shower, eat a fruit. Then you scream at your kids so they eat a fruit and don’t only eat half and leave the rest on the couch underneath the blanket….because you may or may not have sat down on half a banana the other day. Hey! At least it was ripe. 

Anyway, now that you may or may not have had to change your clothes to get rid of a squashed banana on your left butt cheek, you have lost about 30 minutes of your time and more emails have come in your inbox. When you finally get to start it’s about 10.30, you’ve only written 3 emails and been interrupted 99 times because there is a little person who loves to chat with you, but only does it when you are trying to have a professional phone call. You excuse yourself from your team for the 35 seconds you took to mute your mic so you could shout and threaten to turn the TV off or take away somebody’s (won’t point any fingers) toys.

Meanwhile, your man is doing a very very good job.

Well, you are making him think that you think he is doing a very good job. Your man needs to feel like his mere existence, his socks in the living room and his shirtless (luckily for you – muscular) torso are doing a very, very good job. What’s important at this point is not that you stay together at all times (whether it is parents, siblings, mates/spouses or children, nobody likes to be with somebody 24/7). What’s important is….that you make sure your time together is positive and potentially romantic.

Meaning, right after lunchtime is the best time to get the kids to nap. This means that you have time for one kiss and possibly more. DO NOT use that time to talk about kids or bills! DO NOT talk. Talking time is going to be a different time, preferably when the kids are awake. Kids nap time is for your romance. Make sure their bellies are full to increase the chances of the nap lasting more than 20 minutes. 

And there you have it guys, confinement with your colleagues in one ear, your kids in the other, and your man in between the tiny breaks.

I predict there is going to be a lot of “Confinement” babies by the end of the year 🙂